You Know You're ObiWan Obessive When
by Cerasi J
Summary: The title says it all!


Title: You Know You're Obi-Wan Obsessive When...  
Author: Cerasi  
Co-writen by: Obi's Jaina  
E-mail: Cerasi- mcgregorchick23@hotmail.com  
Jaina- obischick@hotmail.com  
Summary: The title says it all!  
Spoilers: Ewan McGregor, Obi-Wan Kenobi  
Category: Humor  
Disclaimer: We don't own anything, and we never will, no matter how much we hope and pray.  
  
Note to reader: We would like to dedicate this story in loving memory of our friend Tess. She was a wonderful friend and Jedi Knight. Tess, we love and miss you. We will never, ever forget you. May the Force be with you...always.  
  
  
You Know You're Obi-Wan Obsessive When...  
  
) Every pic of him you see online you just *have* to print out. (Even though you probably won't really want to.)  
  
) You kiss his picture goodnight/good morning at least once a week.  
  
) You have over 100 pics of him in your room, hanging up or otherwise.  
  
) You MAKE posters of him when you can't find the perfect one.  
  
) You have a calendar full of pics of Obi and you "faint" over it at least once a day.  
  
) You dream of meeting him one day, even though you know it will never happen.  
  
) You don't cry because Qui-Gon died; you cry because Obi must feel so terrible.  
  
) You write his name EVERYWHERE-even on your homework.  
  
) You fantasize about Obi constantly-good and bad.  
  
) You learn by heart *all* of Obi's speaking lines.  
  
) You jump up and start screaming wildly when Ewan's name appears in the credits.  
  
) You start singing "We are the Champions" when Obi dices Darth Maul.  
  
) Talk to ALL your pics...give your favorite a kiss...often.  
  
) Talk to your favorite pic. Make it talk back.  
  
) Kill anyone who disses Obi.  
  
) Buy a cardboard cutout of Obi and worship it.  
  
) Paint your room blue in honor of Obi's beautiful blue eyes and lightsaber.  
  
) When someone calls your name you answer, "Yes Master?"  
  
) Invite all your friends over and rent a Ewan movie, (Not TPM), insist he looks cuter with the Padawan braid, no matter what your friends say.  
  
) Your boyfriend leaves you because he feels he can't compete with a Jedi.  
  
) You start stalking Ewan McGregor.  
  
) Change your last name to Kenobi.  
  
) Have all your girlfriends call you "Obi's Girl"  
  
) You've read every Jedi Apprentice book and can quote it chapter and verse.  
  
) When Ewan has a new movie out you find a way to get tickets to the world premier, when you finally see him, you scream out, "I AM NOT WORTHY!" and fall to your knees, sobbing hysterically.  
  
) Even though you're probably a girl, you want to be Ewan's stunt double in Star Wars Episode II.  
  
) When you answer the phone you say, "Master, destroyers!"  
  
) Remember, you can ALWAYS trust Jedi from the U.N.  
  
) The plates on your car say, "OB4EVER"  
  
) Instead of saying the classic "May the Force be with you," you say, "May the Hot Jedi Padawan be with you."  
  
) You cut your hair in the Padawan style. You have to wear a hat through, because people on the street stop you all the time thinking your Sinead O' Conner.  
  
) You dress up as Obi-Wan every year for Halloween.  
  
) If little kids come to your house dressed as Darth Maul, "slice" them in half with your toy lightsaber.  
  
) Your best friend gets you a Magic 8 Ball for your birthday, the only questions you ask it are, "Will I score a date with Ewan McGregor?" and, "Will I marry Obi-Wan Kenobi?"  
And every answer is: "Signs point to no."  
  
) You go out and buy the 12" Obi-Wan doll, get out one of your old Barbies, dress it up as you would normally dress, and stage a date with Obi-Wan.  
  
) Your parents change their phone number because every time you find a new Obi pic on the 'net you just have to call and tell them about it. Even though they've probably never heard of Ewan or Obi-Wan.  
  
) When you move into a new apartment you go out and buy two new Obi wan pillows for your sofa, when you get home you realize you don't have a sofa because you spent all your money on Obi-Wan stuff.  
  
) You never leave home without your Obi-Wan Kenobi pin. (We have done this!)  
  
) You watch Velvet Goldmine and freeze-frame every shot of Ewan without his clothes on.  
  
) Every day you write love letters to Ewan, finally he writes you back saying, "Stop it. I'm married."  
  
) You write a letter to the producers of all the movies Ewan has every been in requesting more nude seens.  
  
) On Sunday morning your mother tells you to get dressed for church, your sister comes downstairs in a dress and heels, you come downstairs in your homemade Jedi Apprentice shirt and cut-off jean shorts.  
  
) You have ALL of Ewan's movies.  
  
) Ewan files a restraning order against you.  
  
) After a staff meeting, you turn to your boss and say, "You were right about one thing Master, the negations WERE short!" --Thanx to Amidala :)  
  
) Your AOL screen name is "Obis Girl"  
  
) Your comupter password is "obi=hot"  
  
) You have the Obi-Wan action figure and play/talk to it on a regular basis.  
  
And there you have it!   
  
Cerasi- mcgregorchick23@hotmail.com  
Jaina- obischick@hotmail.com  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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